I have now posted photos of the Starting Grids and the Podium Ceremonies of both classes in the Race 1 post above with the Qualy and Race Results. Check them out.
***IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM THE VRAA RACE DIRECTOR***
As most of you are aware, the opening race of the VRAA 2016 season at Mesa Roja was delayed by about a month. At the time, I offered some vague excuses having to do with out of town travel and the challenges of synchronising the schedules of RIR, myself and the other WIMC Racing Club members.
Well, now that the race has finally been run, the results have been posted and the VRAA cars are safely winging their way to sunny, southern California, I feel I must come clean to you, the VRAA entrants, and to all those fans of this series who have supported it through the years. You deserve to know the true story of what has transpired since early September.
It all began with a phone call in the middle of the night from Old Jeb, the Mesa Roja track caretaker. Cellular reception is sketchy in that area of the country and his interrupted words, together with my sleep-fogged brain, made it difficult to understand what Jeb was trying to tell me. But what did come through: “Sit-chew-ayshun… Wall… Git yerself out here… ASAP”, was enough to see me and track owner RIR on the next flight.
After two air connections and a long drive through the mountains, we finally crested the isolated desert mesa, the world’s most unlikely site for a racing circuit. What confronted us was shocking. A giant WALL, cutting right across the race track, and in fact the whole mesa, had been built sometime during the long off-season!
Some of the arriving VRAA race teams, drivers and officials were milling around the mysterious structure. Jeb, astride his trusty quad, was working hard to keep everyone calm. An early-bird group of our famous interplanetary race fans looked on with interest (for background on the Green men of Mesa Roja, check out previous race reports from VRAA races at Mesa Roja in 2013, 2014 and 2015 on SCI). Local media had just arrived and was busy interviewing whoever had a theory on what had happened and also those who had no idea but just wanted to be on television.
At Jeb’s request, some of the Green men climbed trees and a circuit lift-loader – well, they don’t so much
climb as
elevate. They peered over the parapet and reported that all seemed undamaged on the other side: the pits, the paddock, the track itself was ready to go. Except for that infernal wall keeping us out.
Who built such a thing? And why was it here?
“Must be a government plot to keep the aliens out,” joked one driver.
“There’s been a lot of crazy talk lately from some factions about building border walls,” RIR mused, “But Mesa Roja is at least a hundred miles from any border that I know of. So why here?”
One of the Green men laughed with the high frequency giggle of their species. “It won’t keep us away,” he said. “If we can travel all the way here from our home planet, no piddly human wall can block us from attending a VRAA race.”
I found a phone with decent cell reception and called some friends in the capitol After threats of lawsuits and the offer of a number of complimentary tickets to the race, I discovered the “real” story. It turned out the wall wasn’t built by the Border Security Service at all, but by the Transportation Department. The structure was meant for landslide control along a nearby highway, but a surveying snafu had resulted in the thing being constructed in the wrong location!
“Well, when they plannin’ to take it away agin’?” Jeb demanded.
“Apparently, they have to put that contract out to tender,” I explained, “And that could take months.”
“Typical government boondoggle,” muttered a reporter.
“However, they did assure me there is nothing stopping us from doing it ourselves.”
“How we gonna do that? I ain’t got the men nor machinery for that kinda job,” Jeb moaned.
“Lasers,” offered a Green man. “Or, what you would call lasers, at least.”
“You’re packin’ lasers in that ship of yers?” said Jeb with wonder.
The Green men tittered. “We don’t need to pack them. We’re born with them,” one of them said as he turned to look at Jeb with his ruby red eyes.
Jeb ducked out of his direct gaze and backed away cautiously. “Okay then, let’s get started.”
So that’s what we did. The Green men cut through the heavy bolts locking the large access doors in the wall and the race transporters, personnel and fans poured through into the paddock area.
The teams were soon hard at work unloading their race cars. The Vanwall Team had a shiny new transporter to contain their two team entries, just off a freighter from New Zealand.
Mercedes had engineered a new method of carrying two cars on a single car transporter. Those clever Germans in Stuttgart…
Ferrari arrived with two cars, neither painted with the traditional red paint. Enzo must be arguing again with the Italian Motorsport authorities.
While the fans enjoyed the activities…
…Jeb and his volunteer “crew” lasered the wall into pieces and hauled it away.
Soon, the track was back to normal again. The rest of the teams rolled in to the paddock, the spectator crowds returned to their favourite vantage points and the 2016 VRAA Grand Prix of Pista de Carrera Mesa Roja went off without a hitch.
So now you know the true story and I hope you will forgive me for the delay in getting this VRAA season on track.
Old23/Stewart 
